


Dark Horses

by lorichelle



Category: Naruto
Genre: Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Ambiguous Ages, Anal Sex, Blindfolds, Blow Jobs, Bonding, Emotions, Fingering, First Time, Fivesome - M/M/M/M/M, Friends to Lovers, Grief/Mourning, Group Sex, Guilt, Hair-pulling, Incest, M/M, Masochism, Public Sex, Rough Sex, Sexuality Crisis, Spit-Swapping, Uchihacest, Water Sex, ambiguous timeline
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-04-27
Updated: 2020-06-10
Packaged: 2021-03-01 19:40:31
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Underage
Chapters: 3
Words: 13,234
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23882434
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/lorichelle/pseuds/lorichelle
Summary: Kakashi always had a soft spot for each of the Uchihas in his life, a sort of tender fascination. Each of them were special to him in their own unique way. Sometimes he secretly dared to hope that they might have a special place for him, too. And apparently, theydid.Who knew that Kakashi could find a home in their trembling, fiery embrace or that he could find love in four pairs of red eyes?6/9 - New chapter, new tags, updated chapter count
Relationships: Hatake Kakashi/Uchiha Itachi, Hatake Kakashi/Uchiha Obito, Hatake Kakashi/Uchiha Sasuke, Hatake Kakashi/Uchiha Shisui
Comments: 38
Kudos: 168





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> First of all, thank you for taking the time to read my story! <3
> 
> Also, each chapter has its own... scenario if you will, so more tags will be added with the posting of each new chapter. Trust me, the tags currently listed are SO NOT the ONLY things we will get to see in this story ;)
> 
> Please note: This is my first fic in the Naruto fandom. Story and characters belong to Kishimoto. I make no profit from this project. Un-beta'd so all mistakes are my own.
> 
> Again, thank you very much for giving my story a chance :)

_**ITACHI** _

This was one of their last missions in ANBU. They had been on the same team together for their entire tenure. Although Itachi was several years younger than him, Kakashi knew that they were both ready to hang up the masks and move on to something new. 

__

This mission had been just the two of them and it was supposed to be easy - typical assassination, a small group of leaders of a new kidnapping ring; but the life of a shinobi was never easy.

__

So here they were, retreating for their lives, Itachi unconscious on Kakashi’s back, both of them beaten up and bloody, from a group of missing Iwa-nin, through the forest, in the damn rain.

__

+++++

__

Kakashi carefully laid Itachi down onto the ground then turned back to the opening of the cave he found, creating the best sense barrier seals as he could weave quickly. Hopefully they were good enough that no one would be able to hear, smell or see them. He wasn’t worried about their chakra being felt by anyone. They barely had any left to speak of. 

__

He quickly looked around the small cave, hoping to find something for a fire. He barely noticed a few twigs in a ray of moonlight coming from a small opening in the roof of the cave. He sighed when he picked them up, wishing he had a little more to work with but they were dry and that was what ultimately mattered. He raced back to Itachi’s side where his friend lay breathing heavily on his back, eyes closed, a pinched expression on his face. Kakashi organized the twigs within a small border of rocks and lit them with a tiny fireball. He turned back to Itachi. Kakashi patted him down gently, searching for any major injuries. The only thing he came across was a blood stain spreading from underneath the left side of Itachi’s chest armor.

__

Carefully, Kakashi removed the armor from Itachi’s torso and arms, tossing them to the side, the clang as it hit the stone beneath them echoing through the quiet cave. Getting his under shirt off was a bit trickier. Kakashi tried to be as gentle as possible, the garment sticking to the younger man’s skin. Itachi was still limp in his arms and Kakashi held his head still as it lolled against him. A shudder went through him and his breathing appeared labored. Kakashi groaned in frustration. They were both drenched and even if they still had their travel cloaks, they still would have been soaked and useless. He sighed. There was nothing he could do about them being wet, they would just have to air dry and hope the small fire helped warm them quickly.

__

With his top half bare, Kakashi could finally see the gnarly gash under Itachi’s left breast, right at the top of his ribcage. Kakashi leaned close to examine it, fingers pressing gently around it to try and see if the slice went all the way through and cut the bone. Thankfully, it didn’t look like it had, so there was that at least, but the gash needed to be closed immediately to avoid infection. He had lost most of his supplies during the tussle, medical kit included.

__

Kakashi used Itachi’s damp shirt to carefully clean around the gash, although Itachi’s still heavy breathing was making it difficult and was starting to concern Kakashi. He glanced up to see the younger man’s face still contorted, eyes clenched shut in a way that looked like two different expressions struggling for dominance across his pretty face. (Secretly, Kakashi always thought ‘pretty’ was a more fitting word to describe Itachi’s features, more feminine than others but no less deadly. Itachi always seemed to have a way of making violence sexy).

__

Kakashi shook his head and focused. The gash wasn’t too big but it was deep enough to be serious and since Kakashi didn’t have any disinfectant, he had to get it closed now. But he had nothing to work with. He could wrap Itachi’s shirt around his torso to cover the wound but that wouldn’t be good. The cut was just wide enough that infection was guaranteed. And Kakashi was really beginning to worry because Itachi was still breathing unevenly, as if he still hadn’t caught his breath from their retreat and must have been in more pain than he thought.

__

Kakashi looked around, seeing nothing but their broken armor and torn shirts on the ground but then in his peripherals he saw something gleam in the firelight. 

__

His last kunai. 

__

The Copy-nin’s eyes flicked back and forth between the fire and the kunai and he knew that was his only option. It was as crude as wound care could get but historically tried and true. 

__

He grabbed the hilt of his kunai and pulled it to him, looking it over before looking down at Itachi. Sitting beside him wasn’t the best angle for this, he needed to be straighter so he could close the entire wound evenly at once. Kakashi shifted and with only a half measure of finesse he swung his leg over Itachi and straddled the injured man’s hips. He set the kunai down beside him for a moment, grabbing one of the wet shirts again and stretched out a patch before tearing it off, the fabric now a small rag in his hand. He leaned forward, face above Itachi’s as he reached up with his other hand and cupped his face, trying to get his attention.

__

“Itachi? Itachi… hey, look at me,” the younger man’s eyes blinked open but just barely, his head a little more still than before. 

__

Kakashi ran his thumb over the softness of a pale cheek, tapping lightly. “Itachi, I need to cauterize this gash okay? So I need you to stay as still as possible, can you do that?”

__

There was a small nod that still wasn’t quite a nod but Kakashi didn’t have time to question the attempt. His other hand came up to press the rag against Itachi’s lips. “Need you to bite down now, okay? You know this is gonna hurt but I need to do it right now. Here, bite down,” Kakashi said, his voice raised slightly to try and keep Itachi’s half-attention. Pale pink lips parted and let the rag be adjusted in his mouth, thick between the teeth that Kakashi felt confident enough that Itachi wouldn’t bite his tongue or lips off. 

__

Kakashi leaned back and sighed. Now for the hard part.

__

He grabbed another bit of shirt and tore it too, pressing it right under the gash, trying to push the sides as close together as he could. Then, with his other hand, he grabbed the kunai again and stuck the blade into the fire, watching as it heated up, bright orange blending into near white. After about a minute, he pulled the blade from the flames and looked down at his friend. He was a little nervous, he knew what to do but had only done this once and it was to himself, not a fellow comrade. Not a friend - a friend who wasn’t relaxing. 

__

Itachi’s eyes were closed again and his breathing had slowed, his chest rising jerkily from shallow breaths. Kakashi frowned. He needed him to stay still.

__

“Itachi!” he commanded loudly in his captain's voice to try and get through to his friend’s psyche. “Stay still!” His friend froze and let out a very long breath through his nose, body finally at ease. Itachi spread his arms straight out on either side of himself, hands splayed flat against the floor of the cave. 

__

“Okay,” Kakashi said, hovering the hot blade right above the gash. “One, two, three!”

__

The moment the blade pressed flat against his wound, Itachi threw his head back and screamed, a shredded sound through the rag. His body writhed, hips bucking and Kakashi dropped most of his lower body weight down onto him to keep his body still. He wanted this over as soon as possible for both of them.

__

The stench was horrible. Burning flesh in an enclosed space, and the smell of blood and smoke assaulted Kakashi’s nose even through the fabric of his mask. He focused on the wound, watching the skin basically fry and slowly meld together. 

__

“Come on… come on!”

__

Kakashi glanced up to see Itachi’s eyes rolling back even through his closed eyelids. He saw Itachi’s nails breaking as he grasped at the rocks, moaning in pain. 

__

Kakashi blinked when he heard another moan from the younger man beneath him. And then another, and another…

__

The way he felt Itachi’s thighs flex against his ass. 

__

He gasped, nearly choking on that very breath before turning back to the wound. That same breath came out in a relieved woosh. Almost done, the wound was just about closed. Kakashi used the now only lightly damp cloth to help ease the blade off of the skin, trying to avoid any peeling or sticking. He leaned back and let out a long breath, shoulders slumping with exhaustion. He tossed the kunai carelessly to the side somewhere. He still had mind enough to reach forward and gently wipe the edges of the healing skin with the damp cloth. He wiped along the bottom and then he moved to the top of the gash but as he wiped, his thumb lightly brushed against a nipple -

__

And the sound that left Itachi made Kakashi freeze. 

__

A high-pitched whimper echoed loudly around them. That was definitely not a sound brought by pain. The rag fell from his hands as Kakashi shifted slightly, only to have his heart stop in shock.

__

He could feel it in between his legs, right up against him from where Kakashi was still straddling Itachi’s hips. 

__

Itachi was hard.

__

And he was still whimpering softly underneath him. Kakashi watched, stunned into silence as Itachi’s body shook restlessly of its own instinct. He had never seen Itachi like this. He was strong, durable and all deadly grace with all the tolerance of a veteran shinobi. He’d seen the younger man sustain greater injuries than a small gash on the chest. At first, Kakashi wondered if the sword that struck him had been poisoned but no, that wasn’t it. 

__

This, Kakashi realized as he slowly spread his hands over Itachi’s ribcage and gripped him ever so lightly, was pleasure. 

__

A soft sigh left Itachi and the man almost instantly became pliant underneath him. Kakashi watched his face, feeling guilt hit him briefly as he reached down to gently take the cloth out of Itachi’s mouth. His head lolled tiredly, lips moving stiffly from the rag, mouth probably pretty dry by now. As he saw Itachi’s tongue peek out between his lips, Kakashi felt an involuntary urge to lean down and wet Itachi’s mouth with his own. Startled, Kakashi shook his head to try and knock his brain back into place, and slowly dabbed the rag over Itachi’s face, ears and neck, almost tenderly cleaning the sweat from the flushed skin. 

__

Kakashi blinked and looked again. Yeah, splotches of Itachi’s skin were reddening and his lips trembled slightly. Kakashi finally paused and really focused on the situation. 

__

After a fierce and unexpected battle that left them beaten and running for their lives, they were both definitely coming down from an adrenaline rush. But they were healthy and athletic and it took a lot to break them so it didn’t make sense that Itachi hadn’t gotten control of himself or fully relaxed until after the cauterization was done. Itachi wasn’t even fully coherent yet. And when Kakashi had accidentally touched him…

__

Grey eyes flicked up to see charcoal orbs staring straight back at him. 

__

Itachi’s eyes weren’t completely focused but there was enough clarity in them that Kakashi decided to experiment. 

__

Ever so slowly, Kakashi brushed both of his thumbs over Itachi’s nipples, feather light. And as Kakashi received the same high-pitched, almost desperate whimper, he watched the younger man’s eyes fall closed in bliss and a lightning bolt of pleasure shot straight to his cock. 

__

It fucking lit him up. 

__

Still curious, but cautious, he pressed the side of his thumb against the cauterized wound and he saw a flash of real pain in Itachi’s face. Itachi nibbled at his own lips as a breathy moan escaped him.

__

Then, Kakashi brushed his left thumb over Itachi’s nipple and his right thumb into the healing gash at the same time. The younger man actually growled, a hum of satisfaction soothing the edges of it and Itachi bucked his hips and Kakashi saw stars.

__

Itachi was as hard as steel when his groin pushed up against his own. And Kakashi hissed when their erections pressed together through the fabric of their pants and he was stunned once again. 

__

_Holy shit, he was hard!?_

__

Kakashi felt himself trembling now as well. He couldn’t believe this. He was actually turned on by seeing Itachi in this state. And he couldn’t help himself; he brushed Itachi’s nipples again. He received more desperate sighs from the man between his legs. Kakashi felt his heart pounding in his chest, his own breaths coming out ragged. 

__

_What am I doing?_

__

Kakashi had never touched a man like this before, let alone let himself be near another so intimately. That fact alone was enough of a shock. But what was surprising Kakashi the most was how he had no idea that Itachi could end up in such a state. Perhaps it was just the right dose of adrenaline, pain and pleasure that could turn one of the fiercest Uchiha into a moaning, flushed and dazed mess, sprawled out on the floor of a cave in enemy territory.

__

An uncharacteristic whine caught his attention and Kakashi looked as Itachi arched his back, pushing out his chest towards him, almost as if he was begging for Kakashi to touch him again, more needy whines spilling from those chapped lips, and for the second time Kakashi found himself wanting to wet them with his own. Kakashi’s hands wrapped around Itachi’s rib cage, gripping protectively, an unconscious apology, letting him know he was here and that he was sorry he forgot about him even for a brief moment. To make it up to him - 

__

Kakashi pinched Itachi’s nipples and ground their erections together at the same time. 

__

The echo of their cries of ecstasy was deafening. 

__

Kakashi took huge gulps of air through his mask, trying to calm his pounding heart as his cock ached painfully at the sight of Itachi still grasping at the ground, the muscles in his arms flexing beautifully with the effort. He never once reached for Kakashi or anything else around them, just completely pliant beneath his captain. Kakashi’s fingertips lightly stroked Itachi’s nipples, almost tickling, and he watched as the little pink buds came to life at his touch, goosebumps spreading across Itachi’s skin beneath his hands. Without thinking, he yanked down his mask, gasping as a droplet fell from the corner of his mouth and landed in the dip of the sharp ‘v’ of Itachi’s hips, slowly sliding down to disappear beneath his ANBU pants. 

__

_I just drooled on my kohai because I’m dying to suck on his dusty pink tits._

__

_I’m going to hell._

__

_Fuck it._

__

And with that, Kakashi leaned down and flicked his tongue against one and the shivers and sighs he got in return and the sight of Itachi writhing against him as he sucked would be seared inside his mind forever. 

__

Kakashi quickly turned his attention to the other nipple, being very careful not to hurt the healing wound under it. He lapped at it lightly, his thumb coming up to gently stroke the skin next to the edge of the gash, sending a dash of pain to season the pleasure Kakashi was giving his friend with his mouth. Kakashi could only listen to the breathy moans as he let his mouth indulge itself. With every lick and suckle, Itachi’s hips would push against him, making him moan right back. Kakashi could also feel Itachi’s thighs still pushing against his ass, seemingly trying to crush them together as close as possible. From the way his legs moved, Kakashi thought that maybe Itachi was instinctively trying to spread his legs. The chance that Itachi was actually wanting to spread himself for him nearly made him come in his wet pants right there. 

__

_Hmm._

__

Kakashi’s mouth reluctantly left his friend’s nipples - it hurt to hear the sad sound of need and confusion - and took a deep breath and let it out slowly across Itachi’s chest as he gradually wiggled his way downwards. He planted small, light kisses as he went, a few teasing licks here and there. His hands trailed down Itachi’s sides and he loved the way the younger man practically vibrated under him. 

__

When he reached his navel, Kakashi circled it with the tip of his tongue and buried his face into the soft hair below it, which disappeared under the waistband of his pants. Itachi was warm and Kakashi nuzzled his face against his lower belly, breathing him in deeply. When he leaned his face away, he realized Itachi’s erection was right before him and the heat that was literally radiating off of him was strong, drawing him in. Kakashi couldn’t help rubbing his face across the hardness, mouthing it through the fabric.

__

_“Ohh…”_

__

Kakashi paused and glanced up, watching as Itachi’s mouth tiredly formed the single syllable he thought he’d heard, indicating that Itachi was somewhat more aware now. It made Kakashi a little nervous at first. _What if he fully wakes up and snaps out of this, this zone? Would he be repulsed by what his captain, his friend, was doing to him? Was he taking advantage of Itachi?_

__

But as dazed charcoal eyes found his, Kakashi saw pink lips form the only word he needed to throw all doubts to the wind and truly descend upon Itachi.

__

_’Please’._

__

Kakashi slipped his fingers under the waistband of Itachi’s pants and yanked them down, scooting backwards to completely pull them off and toss them away. And the infamous Copy-nin suddenly forgot how to breathe. 

__

Itachi was completely bare, legs spread apart, cock red and aching, arms still out to the side, holding onto the ground for dear life and for a moment, Kakashi had no idea what to do.

__

He had never been with another man before. Truth be told, he was never one hundred percent sure about his own sexuality. Because being straight was more openly accepted, it was easy to take a female lover, and being a typical guy, it was easy to get pleasure from them. Although he did have his porn and honestly, that was enough for him. But the sight of Itachi like this, for him, it’s enough to make him lose his sense of sanity. He never had any lover make him feel this way, this intensity, this high, this hunger. 

__

And as Kakashi reached down and palmed Itachi, as he watched the younger man cry out, as he heard his name fall from Itachi’s lips, as he felt Itachi’s knees tremble around his hips, Kakashi realized -

__

It wasn’t about _what_ he was touching, but _who_ he was touching. 

__

He couldn’t help the smile that split his face at the thought and he giddily slid between Itachi’s thighs, his eyes falling closed as he buried his nose into the soft tuft of hair and breathed him in, the smoky scent with a faint sweetness flooding his senses and Kakashi was dizzy with the musk that was just simply Itachi. 

__

He lifted his head to look at Itachi’s cock. Again, there was a nudge of self-consciousness, reminding Kakashi that he had never done this before - and gods, what if he screwed this up?? - but one look up at Itachi’s face as he gazed down at him with want and a faint smile, Kakashi figured that it wouldn’t take much to send his friend over the edge and hoped that his inexperience would be forgiven. 

__

So Kakashi returned the small smile with an affectionate one of his own and leaned down to lick up the underside of Itachi’s cock. He heard the younger man choke on his own moan, so he did it again, and again, and again, and again until Kakashi caught a drop of precome and he whimpered at the warmth of it as it trailed across his lips. He liked the feel as it trickled down his chin and with no hesitation, he licked over the head, dipping the tip of his tongue gently into the slit. 

__

Itachi bucked reflexively and suddenly Kakashi had the head completely between his lips. He didn’t know who moaned first when he wrapped his lips around Itachi but the world around them faded away and when Kakashi took him all the way down, Itachi screamed. Kakashi had never tasted a man before but with just one taste, he knew he was addicted to Itachi’s flavor. He was enjoying the heavy weight of his friend’s cock in his mouth, marvelling slightly at the soft, velvet smoothness. He tried swallowing around him and Itachi let out a shaky moan. 

__

Music to his ears.

__

He pulled back slowly, sucking harder and harder as he went until he let go of his friend with a wet pop and quickly lapped up the desire that pearled at the head. He could tell Itachi’s high-pitched whine was a warning; _look at him, he’s close, so close!_

__

Spurred on and lost in his own haze of desire, Kakashi took him all the way down again as he gripped Itachi’s hips, swallowed, and then _hummed._

__

Itachi screamed his name and Kakashi suddenly came in his pants, hard; his mouth falling open in his own cry as he felt Itachi come on his lips, on his cheeks, on his jaw, dripping off his chin and dribbling down his neck. He raked his fingers up the backs of Itachi’s thighs and his friend practically sobbed as they both rode out their release. Kakashi could barely hold himself up. He wrapped his arm around one of Itachi’s legs and leaned against him for support, his cheek resting against the soft knee as he tried to catch his breath.

__

Still in his post-orgasmic high, Kakashi wiped his face and neck with the back of his hand before cleaning it off on his pants. 

__

“Kakashi?”

__

A soft, hesitant voice called to him and Kakashi sat up fully, looking down at Itachi with a smile he couldn’t fight. And as Itachi returned it with a shy one of his own, Kakashi licked his lips and leaned down, finally devouring the mouth he had been thirsting for all night.

__


	2. Chapter 2

_**SHISUI** _

“Hey, Kakashi!”

The Copy-nin’s step faltered only slightly at the sudden call of his name. He kept walking and nodded when Shisui dropped down next to him from a tree. “Fast as ever, Shisui. I barely felt your chakra before you said anything,” he glanced at the Uchiha who gave him a big smile. “On your way back to the village?”

“Yup,” the younger man replied, his smile never wavering, a slight skip in his step. “Had one of those random solo missions I’m prone to every now and again. You?”

“Same, actually. I appreciate a good solo mission when I get the chance,” he replied, pulling out his book. Now that he wasn’t traveling alone, he could take advantage of his partner’s presence by giving a good portion of his attention to the story and worry a little less about their surroundings. Ha.

A few minutes later, Shisui scoffed and reached for the book. “Put that garbage away, I’m trying to talk to you.”

Kakashi instinctively held his precious novel safely out of the Uchiha’s reach. “Hey! You didn’t even say anything!”

“Yes I did, I asked you if you wanted to stay there for the night,” he replied, annoyed, and pointed to the northwest. There was what looked like a large compound of some kind, nice too.

“What is that?”

“It’s that family-owned hot spring near the edge of the forest. Konoha is only about another hour away from here.”

Kakashi hummed. He vaguely remembered noticing it before but couldn’t recall if he’d ever stayed there. “Have you stayed there before?” he asked Shisui.

The younger man nodded, turning right off the main path, heading towards the spa. “A time or two. Come on!” he called, already walking away.

But Kakashi stopped. “Um, I don’t know about you but I do have a mission report to give to the Hokage so... I should probably do that.”

Shisui stopped abruptly and turned his head to look at him with a sarcastic expression. “Really Kakashi?” He turned to face him fully. “Was your mission a success?”

“Yes,” Kakashi drawled slowly.

“My mission was too, so all is well and I’m sure the Hokage wouldn’t begrudge us a single night. When the hell have you ever taken a vacation anyway?” he asked rhetorically, turning back and walking towards the hot springs with purpose.

It only took Kakashi a few moments to shrug to himself, stuff his book back in his pouch and hop off after the Uchiha.

+++++

They both hummed appreciatively at the food set before them, a nice variety just for the two of them, courtesy of their host family. Kakashi had to admit that it was nice to have real food that he didn’t have to make himself. It was better than looking forward to getting home late and making a hasty bowl of plain rice or something. This was a luxury he didn’t get very often nor could he afford.

Hence why the bill was given to Shisui. It was his idea after all. Ha.

They both ate mostly in silence, Shisui respectively keeping his eyes down as Kakashi ate his meal strategically, rubbing his belly in satisfaction when he was done.

“Was it good?” his friend asked.

Kakashi hummed and nodded. “Thank you for treating me.”

“Yeah, food always tastes better when it’s free, huh?” he teased, glancing at the Copy-nin with a smirk. “Just the same, you’re welcome. It was my pleasure,” he finished softly.

“We should definitely come here again sometime,” Kakashi passively before leaning back and retrieving his book.

“Oh no you don’t!”

“Ah!” Kakashi squealed, moving to protect his most prized possession yet again. “Why not?”

“Because we’re supposed to be hanging out together, rude ass. You’re not supposed to ignore your date after they paid for everything!” Shisui huffed dramatically, though Kakashi knew he was only half-serious.

_Wait, what?_

“Um… date?” he asked, his voice much higher than he intended.

Shisui only huffed again and shrugged, blatantly ignoring him in favor of taking another bite of dessert. “Besides, the material is so generic, so basic. I mean, the plot is more captivating than the actual sex, which is not a compliment.”

It took a few seconds for all of that to compute for Kakashi. “You mean… you’ve read these!?” he asked in clear surprise.

Shisui waved his fork casually. “Of course I have. I’ll try anything at least twice, just to make sure. Either way, the smut just simply wasn’t my style.”

It took another few seconds for Kakashi to process that. The Uchiha was making his brain short circuit a little with his… knowledge. He cleared his throat and tried to sound completely casual (and probably failing). “So… too much smut, not enough?”

Shisui merely shrugged and wiped his mouth with his napkin.

“Ok… was it… boring? Too much dirty talk?” Kakashi tried his hardest not to blush as he asked. Shisui just shrugged again, a twinkle of mirth in his charcoal eyes.

The little shit.

“Um…” Kakashi felt a drop of sweat run down the back of his neck. “W-was the pillow talk -”

“I would have liked it better if it were two men.”

Kakashi was beyond grateful that he wasn’t chewing anything at that very moment but he did make a strangled sound of shock at Shisui’s honest interruption. And damn the Uchiha for just sitting there, staring at him with his chin resting on his hand and an unreadable look on his face as he locked eyes with Kakashi.

“Oh, I uh, I see,” Kakashi mumbled, feeling awkward and surprised as hell. He felt like he had a rug pulled out from under him as he thought about Shisui’s answer.

_Was… was Shisui…_

“I’m going to go wash up!” Shisui suddenly announced loudly, smacking his hands on the table before standing up to stretch, a few joints popping here and there. “Then we can soak and really relax. See ya out there!” he said as he bounced happily out of the room.

Kakashi could only sit there for a few minutes, still stunned. But then he sighed and whined. Now he would never be able to read his book the same way again.

+++++

Shisui was still inside apparently when Kakashi made his way to the pool, already cleaned up with his towel and bath mask. He had to admit, the steam from the hot water rising into the still air and the level of quiet there was, he had to give it to Shisui; it was actually nice to steal a night of peace and relaxation for himself. He slipped slowly into the water with a long sigh as the warmth seeped the cold out of his bones.

Kakashi leaned his head back and found the full moon staring down at him, it’s brightness like a spotlight exposing him to the night. There was nowhere to hide. The sky was clear, just as it was on this very night all those years ago, when he blinked his eyes open and found the same moon staring down on him as he breathed heavily from the effort of pulling himself and Obito out from the rubble. They laid flat on the ground, wounded and winded, under the full moon. Kakashi remembered the tears falling from his eyes and feeling them trail down across his cheek and over his ear and drenched the ground beneath his head.

He thought of Rin’s sweet and confident smile at him before the enemy nabbed her. If only he knew that would be the last time he would see it.

He thought of Sensei’s bright eyes, as blue as the ocean, shining at him with a smile of faith and certainty lighting up his face before he left to battle the enemy forces. If only he knew that would be the last time he would see them.

He thought of Obito kicking ass with his newly-awakened Sharingan as they came upon the enemy, the two of them quickly falling into the rhythm of their own battle style together. Kakashi remembered thinking then, for a brief moment, just how formidable a force he and Obito could be in the ninja world. They would continue kicking ass together. Obito would become Hokage and Kakashi would follow him and his Will of Fire into the future, bringing the village with it, chasing every setting sun beyond Konoha trees.

But that future was gone, gone forever.

And Kakashi remembered the moon following him like a spotlight in the dark as he raced through the night with Obito and his broken body on his back, hurrying to get home as fast as he could. He remembered Obito reaching for him with his uninjured hand in the hospital, thinking he was on his deathbed, telling Kakashi he was giving him one of his Sharingan, not just as a congratulatory token, but a gift for a friend. He accepted of course. But when Obito miraculously made it through, Kakashi asked his friend if he wanted his Sharingan back, Obito answered after a few moments of silence. He said Rin would have appreciated Obito’s gesture and that Minato-sensei would be proud of him, so no, he would not take back his gift.

“Where are you?”

Kakashi’s head snapped up at the light voice that called to him. He had completely forgotten about Shisui and never heard the younger man enter the pool. He was on the other side, relaxing neck deep in the warm water, his expression soft but concerned.

“Huh?” Kakashi asked.

“You’re a million miles away right now. I was just curious where you are,” Shisui answered quietly, seemingly careful as to not disturb the vulnerable atmosphere. “What part of the past are you lost in?”

Kakashi closed his eyes and hung his head for a moment before leaning it back again, face towards the sky. He was silent as he contemplated. But behind his eyes all he could see was brown hair and radiant smiles, yellow flashes and blue oceans, red eyes and falling rocks, piercing screams and crumbling earth, and then, silence. Just silence, and the moon.

Kakashi gasped and opened his eyes, lifting his head in mild alarm at his thoughts. He chanced a glance at Shisui and his friend was still just sitting exactly how he was with soft and patient eyes.

“Um,” he choked out, clearing his throat once. But he found he couldn’t find the right words. Right now, the only thing he knew was…

He looked skywards yet again. “It’s the same moon,” he eventually answered lamely.

A few quiet moments passed.

“No it’s not.”

Kakashi lifted his head and looked at Shisui, whose smile had turned confident and bright. “What do you mean?” he asked, even though he was the one who technically sounded crazy first.

“I mean,” the younger man said, letting out a long, relaxed sigh as he spread his arms out just under the surface of the water. “It’s not the same moon as that night, because you’re not the same person as you were that night. You’ve been able to spend new days and new nights with Obito. You’ve been able to have new challenges with Gai. You’ve been able to have drinks with Asuma and Kurenai at that new bar. You’ve been able to spend late mornings, long hours and new sunsets with your Genin team.”

Kakashi blinked and looked down at his reflection in the water. Trust Shisui to know exactly what he was talking about. A lot of people remember the night that Kakashi stumbled through the gates of Konoha with only half of his team, one eye missing and a half-crushed Uchiha on his back, his first mission as a jounin captain failed.

Another team was eventually sent to Kannabi Bridge to complete that mission and it helped in ending the war.

But the weight of that failure never left Kakashi, as if he still had Obito on his back all this time.

The movement of the water made him focus back to Shisui, watching as his friend spun lazily in circles, making gentle waves. “You have more than what you have lost,” he continued, voice full of sincerity. “That night, that moon only took two people from you. Their absence will always hurt, yes, but you still have people to hold close. Just watch. When we get home tomorrow, you’re going to see all of your friends, and you’re going to see your little pipsqueaks and my little cousin. Itachi will be there waiting for us at the gate. And I’ll be right there by your side.”

Kakashi was stunned as he listened to his friend and the Uchiha slowed down and straightened up to face him. The openness of Shisui’s face, the way tonight’s moon shone down on him, putting him in a spotlight before Kakashi’s very eyes. This new moon was showing him what he still had to hold on to and he was seeing his friend with new eyes.

Shisui’s expression was a happy one as he spoke again. “You’re not as alone as you feel, Kakashi.”

Shisui waded over towards Kakashi, coming to pause right before him, standing slowly, the water reaching just below the top of the towel around his waist, a gentle smile on his lips. Even without the Sharingan active, he felt like the Uchiha could still see right through him, into his mind, into his very soul. And with the sparkles on the surface of the water reflecting in his friend’s eyes, Kakashi had never felt more naked in his entire life.

Shisui’s smile softened just a little as he locked eyes with Kakashi and, slowly and gracefully, straddled the Copy-nin’s thighs where he sat on the underwater seat, leaning back to mostly rest near his knees, close but not too close, not yet…

Buoyancy thankfully kept a bulk of Shisui’s weight off of him so he could more easily enjoy his closeness. His hands splayed flat on the ground that he leaned against where they rested stretched out on either side of him, his grey eye watching his friend’s every move.

Shisui reached up and slowly ran his fingers through Kakashi’s damp hair, Kakashi’s eyes fluttering at the movement, before sliding down to rest on the side of his neck, his thumb caressing the edge of his jaw. Their eyes never once left each other and Kakashi shivered slightly under his gaze. Then, Shisui leaned in just a little closer and he spoke softly. “I want you, Kakashi.”

Something burst inside his chest that sent a secret thrill down his spine at his friend’s words. “Uh…” he choked out intelligently, but he was quickly distracted by Shisui’s hand sliding down over his collarbone to pause on his chest, right over his heart, and Kakashi felt Shisui’s palm settle gently on him, feeling the pounding beneath his skin beating against the Uchiha’s hand. He watched his friend’s face and saw an almost pleading look but Kakashi suddenly had the distinct feeling Shisui wasn’t talking (just) about sex.

“Will you let me be close to you? Is it alright if my heart cares for you?” the questions were whispered but Kakashi could hear the strong emotions underneath and Kakashi always knew to look underneath the underneath. And as Shisui’s thumb caressed his skin, caressed his heart, and something like hope flowed through him.

Kakashi had always been a more private person than others and one to not get attached emotionally to anyone. He’s lost so much. His father killing himself and dealing with the backlash from the community. Losing Rin and Minato-sensei at Kannabi Bridge. Him and Obito struggling with the survivor’s guilt and Kakashi helping his teammate with his recovery from the devastating injuries he received from saving Kakashi’s life. He’d hardened the deepest parts of his heart. Eventually he allowed himself to feel things but he had never let anyone in, never let anyone (other than Obito) close enough to share a part of his heart, lest he risked having it broken and then left alone to pick up the pieces, if he even wanted to.

But Shisui… Shisui was his friend, his comrade. Although being a shinobi was dangerous and they risked their lives every day and didn’t have a very long life expectancy, they understood what that life was like and how important the little things are and to take the sweet and happy moments wherever you find them. Including treasuring friendships. Shisui was a good person with a heart of gold and not a shred of ill will or evil in him. He wasn’t judgemental and cared deeply for those he held close to him.

He was an Uchiha after all.

Wait, did that include Kakashi as well? Shisui asked if he could be close to him. Kakashi had to admit that the idea felt very uplifting, very soothing, and the idea made him feel… happy. Is this one of those happy moments that he has a chance to have, something special, just for him?

“I-I’m… I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to upset you...” He heard Shisui say as Kakashi came back to the moment, back to the opportunity resting in his lap. He had zoned out too long, leaving Shisui to just sit there, probably taking Kakashi’s distracted silence as rejection. His friend looked worried and completely shattered as he started to apologize and slowly lifted his hand away from Kakashi’s chest.

Kakashi’s hand was on Shisui’s in an instant, covering it and slowly laying it back onto his chest, against his heart. He looked into the younger man’s handsome yet nervous charcoal eyes and decided that he would - he would let himself treasure Shisui and let him in. If he could trust Shisui with his life in battle, he could trust Shisui with his heart in love.

He slowly entwined their fingers and squeezed his hand comfortingly. With his eyes never leaving Shisui’s, he took a leap of faith.

“Yes,” he replied, voice wobbling with emotion. “I want to be close to you too.”

And at that, Shisui grinned happily, a giant smile that outshined the moon above them. The radiance of it surprised Kakashi, and when Shisui wrapped his arms around him and hugged him tightly, he wondered what he could have possibly done to make Shisui want him so, to make his friend look at him with such happiness. Kakashi couldn’t help but smile as he tightened his arms around Shisui’s middle and pulled him close.

But as he did, their hips met and Kakashi gasped as he felt Shisui’s growing erection right against him. He felt Shisui hiss and go still, his voice slightly unsteady as he pressed his cheek against Kakashi’s.

“S-sorry,” he said softly, clearing his throat and Kakashi could hear embarrassment in his voice. “I’m not being presumptuous, honest, it’s just…” he trailed off, sighing and Kakashi felt him shift which rubbed their bodies together again. “I’ve just wanted you for so long.”

Suddenly Kakashi felt a huge weight that he didn’t even know was there lifted from his shoulders and then he felt light as a feather. He felt free. He felt happy. He also felt something else settle in his belly and a _**want**_ the likes he’d never felt before overtook him. He let out a shuddering breath and pulled Shisui all the way to him, bringing their towel-covered erections flush against each other. _When did he get hard??_ His groan was so loud that Kakashi startled himself but was instantly distracted by the high-pitched whine that Shisui let out right by his ear and a _**need**_ that he’d never felt before punched him right in the gut and his hands flew to Shisui’s hips and gripped him so tight he could easily almost crush his hip bones. Kakashi shook as this rush of want bloomed in his core, his blood turning to liquid fire in his veins. He buried his face into Shisui’s chest, trying to catch his breath as his head swam.

_What is happening?_

He’s had sex with people, yes. But this?

_What the hell is this?_

Trying to think back and get some semblance of… well, sense, when he was with past partners, it was just sex. Had he ever felt true, raw and primal desire for them?

_Like this? Fuck no._

He vaguely registered a pressure on his chest, over his heart, and then there was a tingling sensation as something like an actual breeze flowing through him, slowly cooling the raging fire. He barely had the control to crack open an eye just enough to see soft glowing green light emanating from Shisui’s hand to spread over and around his heart, calming him, slowly letting him drop down, sliding gently into peace, slipping into still waters.

_Shisui._

Kakashi was completely overtaken.

“You still with me?” a nervous, wobbling whisper in his ear. Kakashi managed a small nod. He felt a finger touch the bottom of his chin and move to lift it but Kakashi turned his face away and closed his eyes.

“Not, not ready yet,” he breathed. _Not ready for what?_ To look into Shisui’s face and see his friend through changed eyes? What would he see? Not ready for Shisui to see his face? A tiny spark of panic surged through him. Ok. Maybe not just yet.

Shisui must have sensed his hesitation more than he’d heard it. He shifted back a little and Kakashi felt him rise up and by reflex he cracked open an eye, his face still angled into Shisui’s chest. And then stomach. He saw Shisui’s navel and then below the top of the towel above the water. He then saw Shisui’s hand slowly come down to undo his own towel. Both of Kakashi’s eyes flew open as he watched his friend slowly uncover himself and take off the towel. Through the sparkles of moonlight on the surface of the water, he could see the dim silhouette of his friend, of the strong thighs bracketing him. Kakashi’s hands moved on their own. They released their death grip on Shisui’s hips (he hoped he hadn’t hurt him too badly) and slid down to settle on those thighs, skin soft in the warm water.

But then Shisui leaned back slightly and brought his towel up to wring it out. Kakashi had to sit back up but only just enough to watch as Shisui folded the towel neatly, longways, until it was more like a thick ribbon. Kakashi frowned, curious. Then, slowly, Shisui lifted the towel up towards his face and placed it over his eyes and wrapped it around his head. A blindfold.

Kakashi felt his eyes widen when he could no longer see Shisui’s but instead, he saw a small but serene smile on his friend’s lips, as he rested upright on his knees before Kakashi. He was spellbound for what felt like forever, which is why he jerked slightly when he felt Shisui undo Kakashi’s own towel, though he paused when he jumped.

_If I can trust him with my life in battle, I can trust his body with mine._

With that, he lifted his hips and let his friend completely remove his towel and wring it out. Kakashi glanced up and still saw the same small smile on his friend’s pouty lips and suddenly Kakashi was more aware of the mask against his own lips, lips that suddenly trembled against the fabric with a want of their own.

But then the world dimmed as Shisui placed his towel over his eyes and gently secured it around Kakashi’s head. Kakashi let out a long breath and focused his bearings. His hands were still on Shisui’s soft thighs and they squeezed, thumbs digging into his inner thighs and he couldn’t help but chuckle lightly at his friend’s squeak of pleasure.

In retaliation, Shisui settled back down on his legs and ground their hips together and Kakashi cried out, their now completely bare bodies grinding together. Kakashi’s arms wrapped around Shisui, holding on for dear life as the pleasure ran through him, threatening to make him float away. And when Shisui reached down and took them both in a strong hand, Kakashi could have wept.

Kakashi got lost in the feeling of the strong body in his arms, of their cocks sliding together deliciously. It took him time to register that Shisui’s other hand was somewhere else. He unwound one of his arms from around his friend and placed it on his shoulder, following the hard, flexing muscles down and around until his hand found Shisui’s -

He had two fingers inside himself. And as they moved, he felt Shisui breathe in and out against Kakashi’s ear. Experimentally, he lightly rubbed the edge of his friend’s hole, feeling hot knuckles brush against his own and he felt Shisui shiver against him.

Kakashi couldn’t see, he couldn’t even _think_ anymore. So he chose not to. He gave himself over to his sense of touch and slid his finger inside Shisui right along his own. A sweet gasp of surprise relit that fire in his veins.

Music to his ears.

The way Shisui gripped their cocks tighter had Kakashi revving up, that uncontrollable want from before creeping back into his bones and he clumsily pulled Shisui’s fingers from himself and plunged three of his own deep inside. The younger man cried out and nearly collapsed on top of Kakashi, the hand working them losing its rhythm. Shisui rubbed his face across Kakashi’s collarbone, a crumbling mess of bliss against him. Kakashi grinned under his mask and plunged his fingers deeper.

The idea was certainly strange to him. He’d never done this before to anyone, never tried anything with himself. But as he plucked the Uchiha apart with his fingers, as he felt his friend shake, as he listened to Shisui’s needy whimpers against his skin, in his mind Kakashi heard the echo of a thought from inside a cave on a night long ago.

It was not about _what_ he was touching, but _who_ he was touching.

And as he heard Shisui’s choked out, desperate “please”, Kakashi withdrew his fingers. He heard Shisui whimper at the loss but Kakashi grabbed his hips again and settled his friend over his cock. He turned his face to find Shisui’s and when his covered nose brushed against his chin, Kakashi knew he was ready.

He reached up, slid off his mask and tossed it away.

He heard Shisui gasp when their bare noses brushed together and Kakashi nuzzled him before he paused. He gently squeezed his friend’s hip in a silent ask. _Are you sure?_ He felt Shisui nod before sinking down slowly onto his cock, inch by magical inch.

“Kakashi,” Shisui gasped against his lips as he bottomed out and shook on Kakashi’s cock. Kakashi saw stars as Shisui surrounded him.

With Kakashi’s face finally bare against Shisui’s, he felt his friend smile against his lips and rub their noses together affectionately, making Kakashi’s skin tingle at the sweetness.

But then suddenly Shisui bit Kakashi’s bottom lip and clenched himself tight around his cock.

Kakashi threw his head back, tossed by the dual sensations. “Ah, fuck!” he shouted, panting to the sky. He lifted his head and wrapped his hands around Shisui’s hips and gripped hard, growling low and wishing he could see his face for this.

“You little shit,” and with that, he brought Shisui down on him as he snapped up hard, making the Uchiha fucking scream, his cry echoing around them.

_“Fuck,”_ gasp. _“Yes,”_ pant.

Kakashi was about to thrust up again when Shisui quickly sat up, grabbed Kakashi’s shoulders and _lost it_.

Shisui flexed those beautiful thigh muscles against Kakashi’s legs as he lifted himself up slightly and ground down hard onto his cock, pushing a loud groan out of himself. He rolled his hips, swivelling them, fucking stirring himself with Kakashi’s cock. He was damn near helpless under Shisui as his friend rode him like a man possessed. All he could do was hold onto strong hips, his nails digging into olive skin as Shisui bounced on his cock, crying out into the night.

Shisui’s name means ‘still water’ but right now the man was making waves. Kakashi can hear the splash of the bath water and feel it wash up to his chest every time he felt Shisui’s cock brush against his lower abdomen. Shisui then reached just behind himself and wrapped his hands around Kakashi’s thighs and fucked himself faster on his cock.

Kakashi’s eyes were rolling behind the blindfold. Not being able to see Shisui in his passion; not being able to see his chest rising and falling as he gasps, to not see what parts of his skin flushed when he was in throes, to see his dark, wet curls mussed in the humidity, to see his trembling lips…

A tiny jolt of guilt hit him when he thought about how considerate Shisui was being with the blindfolds. He wanted to be with him but also had respect for Kakashi’s mask. And to keep it fair, he’d blindfolded them both, which also just so happened to increase stimulation. Without sight, what they could hear and touch was what they saw in their minds. His mind flaked apart, mush in the mixture of all of the different pleasures washing over him.

The Copy-nin genuinely appreciated Shisui’s gesture. He was giving Kakashi a chance to enjoy himself while not being distracted by the attention on his face.

But Kakashi wasn’t wearing his mask anymore. And all Shisui had done was smile (and bite, the little shit!) against his lips, never once taking or asking for a kiss. And Kakashi found himself really wanting to feel his friend’s lips.

But the Uchiha’s desperate and constant movements were quickly bringing Kakashi to the edge and he could tell by the way Shisui had lost his rhythm that he was right there too. Kakashi reached around his lower back and pulled him upright once more before bringing him forward. Shisui started gasping, gripped Kakashi’s shoulders again. “Kakashi,” he whined helplessly. “I… I-ah!”

Shisui tensed up and Kakashi felt his own coil of arousal snap and then, as quick as lightning, he let go of Shisui and reached up and yanked off both of their blindfolds at once, his eyes flying open wide, both of them, Sharingan spinning as it locked gazes with two others. Shisui’s wide red eyes bore into his and Kakashi could see the tomoes practically vibrating. Kakashi brought their foreheads together, their eyes right up against each others’ and reached down between them and grabbed Shisui’s untouched cock and then the world around them faded away.

All he could see was red and black shapes that danced as his orgasm rocked him. Their eyes were locked together, wide and totally unblinking. It was hard, trying to bear the shock of their orgasms without their eyes falling closed, lost to the ecstasy. No, he wanted to watch Shisui. He hadn’t gotten to watch Shisui fuck himself on him but he was going to peer into his soul as he came inside of him, his heat flooding his friend to the brim.

Finally the peak of the rush passed and both of their eyes fell closed, their panting breaths slowing to soft sighs. And then he felt Shisui’s lips brushing lightly over his, at long last, asking shyly and Kakashi wasn’t going to have him wait one more second. He tilted his head and slotted their mouths together, fitting perfectly. They didn’t rush. He felt Shisui’s hand slide into his hair just as his tongue slipped inside and Kakashi moaned softly. It was such a sweet kiss, not full of intense instincts but full of affection and a gentle caring. He couldn’t help the smile that tugged at the corners of his mouth as he and Shisui savored their first kiss. Kakashi was already hoping there would be more, many more. They pulled apart slowly, a thin string of saliva between them that Shisui quickly licked up before leaning in to rest his cheek against Kakashi’s.

Kakashi felt Shisui’s mouth against his ear. “Tell me something, Kakashi…” he asked breathlessly in that soft baritone. Kakashi held the younger man closer. “Hmm?”

Suddenly, the lips against his ear curved into a face-splitting grin, teeth and all, and Kakashi froze as he heard the barely there teasing whisper.

“Do I taste like Itachi?”


	3. Chapter 3

_**ITACHI** _

One of the reasons Kakashi wore his mask and buried his face into his porn books was to deter people from really seeing him. It was a good way to hide in the open. Which was good because the whole trip back to Konoha after leaving the Land of Waves, his heart was as heavy as a mountain when he thought back to what it was like, seeing Sasuke fall to Haku on the bridge, seeing his body laying there covered in needles and blood.

He had failed, again. He failed another Uchiha.

Images of another Uchiha presumably lifeless under a rock had flashed before his eyes. And then, that grief he felt only for an Uchiha took over him and of course, how ironic it was to have his lightning blade intercepted again in a sacrificial move by someone who didn’t deserve it.

Was he doomed? Was he cursed?

And the relief he felt when Sasuke came around was the same relief he felt when Obito came around and it was just as strong as it was back then.

_Was_ he cursed? Is this what happens when he cares for an Uchiha? He can’t protect them. As much as he wants to, he can’t keep them safe.

But… he had managed to keep Itachi safe.

As they reached the gates, Kakashi watched as his team headed in the direction of the hospital and paused, looking at Sasuke’s form as he walked tensely, no doubt sore and hurting after everything they’d all just been through. He knew he should get himself looked at too but he’ll put that off for later. First, he was going to go give the report, because it was going to be a very long one due to the unexpected nature of the mission and he wanted to get it over with as quickly as he could. Then, he would go home, wash up and nap before going to the hospital.

But sleep battled him just as fiercely as Zabuza had. Images of blood and bodies, deafening screams and a hurt that seared a hole in his chest, just like he did to Rin and Haku -

Kakashi bolted upright in bed, sweat dripping down his neck, his hair matted against his forehead, his chest heaving as he struggled to escape his own mind. His room was dark, so he must have slept until evening. He managed to get himself out of bed and into the bathroom where he splashed cold water on his face and held his head under the running faucet for a few minutes. Making no move to dry, his hair clung to him and water cascaded down his neck and shoulders. The Copy-nin looked up but in the mirror all he could see was Sasuke’s body on the ground, covered in needles and cloaked in mist.

Kakashi sighed and hung his head. Forget the hospital.

He needed to see Itachi.

+++++

It was a full moon again and the night was still young so the dying crowds were white noise to Kakashi as he made his way lazily towards the Uchiha compound, his sandals feeling like they were made of lead. Sasuke was surely released by now and resting at home. He was hoping Itachi was home as well but if he was, then he and his parents knew about the mission by now.

What do they think of him? The sensei who couldn’t protect their son. The friend who couldn’t protect his little brother.

He eventually came to the gate of the Uchiha district and stopped and just simply stood there, his eyes glued to the Uchiha fan above.

He needed to apologize to Itachi but he feared his reaction. He didn’t think he could bear to see anger and disappointment and regret on his friend’s pretty face. All Kakashi wanted to see, all he’s seen in his dreams since the cave, was the way those charcoal eyes looked at him with fondness as they flickered in the firelight.

_*** * * * *** _

_Still in his post-orgasmic high, Kakashi wiped his face and neck with the back of his hand before cleaning it off on his pants._

_“Kakashi?”_

_A soft, hesitant voice called to him and Kakashi sat up fully, looking down at Itachi with a smile he couldn’t fight. And as Itachi returned it with a fond one of his own, Kakashi licked his lips and leaned down, finally devouring the mouth he had been thirsting for all night._

_He didn’t waste any time with gentle gestures. He leaned down and slid his tongue right into Itachi’s mouth, sealing their lips together. A tiny moan left him when he finally got to taste his friend and, sure enough, both of their mouths were quite dry. Kakashi lapped at the roof of Itachi’s mouth and he felt his friend’s tongue swipe under his own at the saliva gathering there. A flick here and there and then they finally found their rhythm, their tongues swirling, massaging each other. Itachi whimpered softly._

_They were parched men._

_Kakashi slowly pulled their lips apart but quickly wrapped his own around Itachi’s tongue and suckled, the sensation pulling a high pitched sound out of him as the younger man jolted against him and Kakashi would bet money that his kohai’s toes were curling right this very second. Kakashi moaned at the thought. He swallowed lightly, grateful for the little hydration they were able to get from each other._

_Itachi managed to free his tongue from Kakashi and swallowed a little as well, his face relaxing just the slightest before the younger man let out a long breath and looked up into Kakashi’s eyes._

_Then shuddered violently._

_Itachi’s eyes clenched shut and he whined, finally lifting his arms off the ground and covered his front. Kakashi blinked and then remembered they were in a cold cave with only a tiny fire for warmth and torn, wet clothes. And how long had Itachi been on the ground? How long had it been since they got here? Gods, Itachi probably had fucking pneumonia by now!_

_“Shit! I-I’m so sorry, Itachi!” The Copy-nin apologized profusely as his friend laid there helplessly and shook. Kakashi hurriedly stood up and immediately wobbled and had to take a few seconds to right himself after being on the ground like they were for so long._

_He looked at the small fire. The cave definitely wasn’t as cold as it was when they first arrived, thanks to the flames finally warming up the space but the ground was still cold. He contemplated laying them down side by side but that meant more of their bodies being against the cold ground which would keep taking their body heat. So instead, Kakashi took off his wet, come-dried pants and tossed them aside and helped Itachi move closer to the fire and they both down, Itachi nestled in between Kakashi’s legs as the Copy-nin pressed their legs together and wrapped his arms all around Itachi, mindful of his injury and pulled him as close as he could, shivering as he felt Itachi’s ice cold back against his chest._

_They were quiet for a while, save for the occasional gasp and wince as they slowly warmed up. Kakashi was resting his face against the back of Itachi’s head and underneath (wayyy underneath) the grime he could faintly smell what Itachi’s shampoo must smell like, a light, sweet freshness and he chose not to fight the urge to close his eyes and simply breathe him in. It seemed to relax every muscle in his body._

_Then, eventually, Itachi tensed slightly. “Please forgive me, Kakashi,” his low voice was uneven with what sounded like embarrassment. He pulled back just enough to mumble into black hair._

_“What in the world for?” Kakashi was genuinely confused until he heard Itachi grunt when the man shifted in his arms, the crudely treated gash obviously causing him discomfort._

_Ohhh, right._

_“It’s-”_

_“I, I have a thing…” Itachi interrupted him and Kakashi blinked. “...okay…?”_

_Itachi made a small strangled sound of frustration and Kakashi held him a little closer, trying to make him feel better. “It’s alright, you know you can talk to me,” he whispered encouragingly. There was a moment before Itachi continued quietly._

_“What I mean is… sometimes, sometimes when I’m in physical pain, somehow my body gets…” Kakashi felt Itachi’s cheek resting against his bicep get warm and Kakashi knew that Itachi was blushing. “It’s like my body converts the pain into pleasure. Maybe it’s some sort of survival mechanism but it started happening not long after I hit puberty,” Kakashi tried not to smile as he felt the cheek against his bicep get hotter._

_“Sounds like you’re just a natural masochist,” Kakashi whispered. And then suddenly Itachi turned in his arms and leveled him with a confused and almost affronted look and it was the Copy-nin’s turn to blush. “Uh… I mean, you know… you… a little physical pain gets you excited. There’s nothing wrong with it. You just…” Kakashi faltered and as he looked at Itachi’s awaiting expression, he had to chuckle. “You just… have a thing.”_

_Itachi’s eyes widened comically and his face was deep red but before he went to turn away in shame, Kakashi wrapped his arm tighter around Itachi’s shoulders, holding him close, keeping him from turning away. Kakashi laughed softly and leaned into Itachi’s neck where he buried his nose into the dark hair, again relishing that sweet freshness that was quickly reminding him of home._

_A small sound got his attention and Kakashi froze._

What the fuck am I doing??

_Kakashi let out a shuddered breath and went to pull away but it was Itachi that stopped him, the younger man leaned up and pressed their lips together and after one startled moment, Kakashi just melted against Itachi like butter, moaning softly in what was almost a breath of relief. But the kiss was chaste and just enough to ground him. Itachi leaned back to look at him, his charcoal eyes shining playfully as he spoke quietly._

_“Do you… have a thing?”_

Damnit Itachi, get that little smug look off your face.

_But Kakashi wasn’t quick enough to come up with a smooth retort so he just snorted lightly and leaned his head against Itachi’s. “Maybe,” he admitted quietly after a moment.._

_“You can talk to me.”_

_Kakashi couldn’t help the small smile that pulled at his lips. How easy it was to talk to Itachi. He enjoyed not having to use many words in order to have a full conversation with him. Itachi wasn’t dramatic or complicated. Just a simple back and forth was all they needed and Kakashi had to admit to feeling adoration from hearing Itachi send his words back to him._

_But Kakashi was quiet for a few moments. What could he possibly say? What did he even want? He had no idea but one thing he did know was that he and Itachi connected tonight somehow and now, with the two of them naked and wrapped in each other’s arms, Kakashi had to acknowledge that the world suddenly felt a little different. His world. He felt different, but what did he feel? And what would the morning look like? What happens when they get home?_

_Kakashi sighed and shook his head against Itachi’s shoulder. He felt the younger man shift nervously and Kakashi realized he had gotten stuck in his own head again. Screw the morning, screw tomorrow._

_He reached up and gently cupped Itachi’s cheek and brushed their noses together and looked nervously into charcoal eyes. “I…” he whispered slowly. “I don’t want to stop kissing you.”_

_He watched as Itachi’s eyes glazed over in the firelight and the Uchiha reached up, tangling his fingers through the hair at Kakashi’s nape. Kakashi saw Itachi’s lip tremble as he let out a shuddered breath._

_“Then don’t.”_

_Kakashi let out a deep breath he hadn’t realized he’d been holding and titled his head, slotting their lips together again. This time, they weren’t lost in a haze of ecstasy so they went slow. Being more sober-minded now, Kakashi could appreciate the shape and feel of Itachi’s lips against his own. The two shinobi were like two different puzzle pieces that just happened to fit together in a happy chance._

_Kakashi moaned softly and then Itachi was shyly slipping his tongue past his lips and the Copy-nin happily obliged him, parting his lips slightly, whimpering at the warm and delicious way their tongues embraced. The Uchiha was panting lightly through his nose and his grip tightened around the back of Kakashi’s neck._

_Kakashi hummed as he lapped into Itachi’s mouth, the hand on Itachi’s cheek slid back, fingers threading into silken black strands. But when Itachi suddenly nipped at the tip of Kakashi’s tongue, Kakashi accidentally tugged._

_Itachi’s head moved back and he gasped before going rigid for a split second before letting out a long, slow moan, his eyes clenching shut while Kakashi’s widened._

_Oh, sweet fucking heaven help him - Itachi likes his hair pulled._

_Kakashi buried his face in a pale neck and groaned loudly against Itachi’s throat, tongue licking a long flat stripe up to his pulse point which beat against his teeth. He could feel Itachi digging his broken nails into his skin but he paid no mind. His mind was dizzy with the energy radiating between them._

_“Gods, this is going to be a problem, Itachi,” he growled softly under his friend’s ear. The Uchiha whimpered but Kakashi peppered light kisses on the shell of his ear to calm him. “I might not want to stop doing this to you either,” he punctuated his words with one more tug, this one slow and calculated, pulling even further backward and Kakashi was mesmerized by the exposure of his neck, how his mouth falls open in a silent cry of pleasure before gasping out a whine._

_“Ah, Kakashi… ouch!” Itachi suddenly hissed, reminding them that he was still injured._

_“Shit! Sorry! Here, let’s just do this for now,” Kakashi said, instantly pulling back and then turning his friend back around to rest against him but this time he laid them both down on their sides still facing the fire. They would just have to deal with the cold, hard ground. Kakashi tried to catch his breath and calm down from that rush that overcame him earlier._

_“We really should rest now,” the younger man said softly. Kakashi pressed a kiss to Itachi’s hair and breathed him in. He made sure to hold Itachi close throughout the night, not just to keep warm, but to let him know that he was right where Kakashi wanted him to be, where it was okay to be. In his arms._

_+++++_

_They felt like complete and utter shit when morning finally came but they did manage to make it back to the village in decent time. A day's travel and the full moon was high in the night sky when they entered the gates._

_They paused and looked at each other, both of them couldn’t possibly be more worse for wear, but even still, under the bright moonlight Kakashi could see the quiet loveliness in Itachi, the same that had hypnotized him last night and sent him tumbling into feelings he wasn’t prepared for._

_Itachi wiped some sweat off his brow and Kakashi caught sight of his friend’s nails again._

_He growled softly in despair and took one of his hands in his own and brought them up, looking closely. “Don’t worry, we’ll get these fixed,” he promised quietly, his thumb running soothingly over Itachi’s knuckles. Kakashi blinked and looked up and was tethered by what he saw in his friend’s own eyes, eyes that can see things even the Sharingan can’t see. It was hard to hide from Itachi._

_He barely noticed that he was still cradling Itachi’s hand. Kakashi wasn’t sure why he hadn’t let go of his friend’s hand yet but there was a tiny spark of excitement when he noticed Itachi wasn’t pulling away either._

_Here they were, right before the gates, and even though it’s late, anyone could still walk by. But the bond that had suddenly blossomed between them was too strong to fight. Kakashi almost literally felt like he couldn’t let him go. But they had the night and the darkness kept them hidden in plain sight._

_Kakashi felt Itachi’s fingers twitch and saw his brow furrowed before finally pulling away, a look of pure reluctance pinching his pretty face. “I’ll go give the report. You can go ahead and go home,” his friend said softly and even though it seemed a little messed up, Kakashi, being the coward that he was, took him up on the offer. He nodded._

_He turned to head in the direction of home when he glanced back at Itachi. “But go to the hospital when you’re done and get looked at… please,” he begged softly. His friend gave him a small smile and nodded._

_The Copy-nin couldn’t wait a second longer. If he didn’t go now, he wouldn’t, and right now he needs to get his head on straight. So instead of running home, he vanished in a puff of smoke, unaware of the charcoal eyes staring longingly at the space where he had just been, long after the smoke cleared._

_*** * * * *** _

It had been a long time since that night in the cave but their relationship never changed, for which Kakashi was grateful. Itachi was never one for drama or holding grudges. On the job, he was always professional. When they both retired from Anbu not long after, they were both jonin in regular mission rotation for a while before Lord Third decided to give him genin teams as some sort of cruel entertainment at Kakashi’s expense. He and Itachi were still friends and still hung out from time to time when they were off duty. Everything was normal and yet it wasn’t.

They had never again talked about that night years ago and that was fine with Kakashi except that it wasn’t. Everything might have been normal on the outside but on the inside, the Copy-nin was in a perpetual state of confliction. In his heart, he always felt like there was a random little empty space that ached, ached in the same way that Kakashi’s hands did whenever he was near his friend, the way they tingled and cramped with the yearning to hold Itachi’s own, with the urge to reach out and bring him further into his life and never let him go.

But, he didn’t deserve it. How could he be worthy of Itachi’s heart if he couldn’t protect his most precious person, his little brother?

Kakashi sighed and finally looked down from the Uchiha fan above the district gate… only to jump back a few feet in momentary fright.

Itachi was standing right in front of him.

Kakashi groaned at himself internally. It’s like he can’t keep his guard up when Uchiha are around.

“What are you doing, Kakashi? You’ve been standing here zoned out for almost ten minutes,” the younger man asked.

Kakashi sighed again and went to run his fingers through his hair but paused before looking back up at Itachi. “So… does that mean you’ve been watching me stand here for almost ten minutes?”

Beneath his mask, he smiled in victory at the blush that stained his friend’s cheeks but Itachi wasn’t otherwise fazed and walked over to him, speaking quietly.

“What’s wrong, Kakashi?” Itachi asked, concern evident in his eyes and though he was touched by it, Kakashi hesitated before those eyes and eventually hung his head in shame before answering quietly.

“I’m so sorry, Itachi.”

There was a pause before a surprised whisper. “For what?”

Kakashi felt the emotion bubble up inside him and he tensed and clenched his eyes shut against the sorrow throbbing behind his eyes. “I couldn’t protect Sasuke. It was my fault he almost died. I-I failed him. I failed you both.”

He heard Itachi sigh softly. “Kakashi, it wasn’t your fault things went bad. None of you had any way of knowing what the mission would turn into or who you would end up facing-”

Kakashi growled in irritation. He had heard that already today! “Yeah, yeah, I know that but-”

A hand suddenly gripped his bicep painfully and Kakashi looked up at his friend, startled to see a serious look on his face.

“Do _not_ ‘yeah yeah’ me, Kakashi,” Itachi’s eyes bore into his. “It is what it is and what happened, happened. Yes, I was worried when I first heard but after hearing the details, I personally think you should be proud of your team.”

Kakashi blinked, not expecting to hear that. Itachi smiled and loosened his hold on Kakashi’s arm but did not remove it.

“You heard me right,” his friend said, his smile softening. “You should be proud. You were completely trapped in that water prison and yet these three little genin, still wet behind the ears and on their first mission, unexpectedly faced a Mist Swordsman all on their own and somehow managed to save you. Your training made it possible for them to pull that off. And by the time everything was all over, you all survived and your genin made it home with a solid foundation that they didn’t have when they first left. Your knowledge and your values are shaping them into the great shinobi they are no doubt going to be. As far as almost dying goes…”

Itachi paused at length and moved his hand up to rest reassuringly on Kakashi’s shoulder. He leaned closer and whispered, quiet resignation in his voice. “Sasuke is a full fledged shinobi now. And dying in battle is just part of the job.”

Kakashi couldn’t stop his eyes from becoming wet. “My values… values that I learned from an Uchiha,” he mourned, voice breaking as he thought of a crying boy with orange goggles.

It was quiet for a moment before Itachi’s small smile turned playful. “Yeah, yeah.”

Kakashi couldn’t stop the snort at Itachi sending his words right back to him, as usual and he couldn’t fight the soft laughter. Itachi’s hand left his shoulder and slowly trailed down his arm before their fingers caught again, tangling together easily.

_Oh no_ , finally, _finally_ he had Itachi’s hand in his again after all this time and Kakashi didn’t know what to do. How could he possibly let go? He felt his friend’s fingers tighten around his and Kakashi felt his heart in his throat -

“Hey you two!”

\- before it promptly jumped out of his chest.

Their hands jerked away and they turned to face Shisui like two teenagers caught doing something sneaky.

“H-hey Shisui,” Itachi said, his voice blipping as he quickly composed himself but the reddening of his ears told Kakashi that he was just as nervous as he was. The older Uchiha chuckled and walked up to them, smiling at Kakashi before glancing at Itachi.

“Your mother says dinner is ready,” he said simply, eyes twinkling with something Kakashi was too tired to try and decipher.

“Right,” Itachi replied and left Kakashi’s side for Shisui’s as they turned and made their way through the district entry. Both Uchihas paused and turned back to him and Itachi looked at Kakashi. “Why don’t you come by and visit Sasuke tomorrow? I’m sure he’d like that,” his friend’s smile was soft and knowing and Kakashi felt like butter all over again.

Shisui lifted a hand and waved to him. “Good to see you Kakashi. And great job on your team’s first mission. You should be very proud of your pipsqueaks,” he grinned and winked before turning back..

Kakashi sighed, again, and finally slid his fingers through his hair as he made a strangled sound. “Damn Uchihas stressing me out all the time,” he chuckled to himself as he made his way home, not noticing how close Itachi and Shisui walked together or how Shisui leaned in and whispered into Itachi’s ear.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Happy Birthday, Itachi! <3

**Author's Note:**

> Hit me up on Tumblr [@lorichelle-x](https://lorichelle-x.tumblr.com/)


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